Itsy Bisty Yellow Polka Dot Bikini

I just watched one of the most well articulated speeches about modesty I think I've ever seen. And surprisingly enough, it was given by my childhood hero- a Power Ranger. Jessica Rey was one of the Power Rangers but has now made her own swimsuit line called, "Who says it has to be isty bisty?" Her study of the evolution of the swimsuit, as well as her personal example of modesty, is noteworthy! 

My favorite line in her speech is, "Modesty isn't about hiding ourselves, its about revealing our dignity". Amen Jessica Rey, amen! Here's the video link, enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJVHRJbgLz8

"God could not be everywhere, therefore he made Mothers"

Mary Cassatt

An old Jewish proverb goes "God could not be everywhere, therefore he made Mothers". Today is Mother's Day; one day in 365 when children stop to really contemplate the sacrifice of their mothers. The service mothers render to their children is holy and sacred. From the time of conception, women begin to sacrifice for their child- they sacrifice comfort and physique. Then the baby is born (after much much more sacrifice) and more is given. Often women give up careers and personal ambitions for the good of their children, not to mention personal comforts. The first sacrifice of motherhood was made by Eve in the Garden of Eden. She partook of the fruit that enabled her to become mortal and have children, and in consequence to that action was subject to pain and sadness. She left the wonder of the garden to become a mother, multiplying and replenishing the earth. I believe a mother's service to her children is comparable to the service and sacrifice Christ rendered during his time on earth. The picture to the left is one of my all time favorites, a mother and child piece by Mary Cassatt. This piece alludes to the Bible recording of Christ washing the feet of his disciples. Christ served and taught His people while He lived on the earth, and so Mothers serve and teach their children. They teach the love of God by loving. Mothers teach service by serving. Though I am not a mother, I have been served and taught by many strong women in my life. My own mother showed me unconditional love many times in my life, which helped me to understand how my Heavenly Father can love me even when I make mistakes. She has humbly served her family and many many others throughout her life, and to me, her service is holy. No cake pan or breakfast in bed can ever compensate for the sacrifices made, but I hope one day to be just like my mother, for she truly spreads the love of God everywhere she goes. 

Attraction: How it has evolved

I just saw this picture and thought it was hilarious. So here's for a little lighthearted feminism...

"Again I renew the call for a return to virtue" -Elaine S. Dalton

Two weeks ago, the world had the wonderful opportunity to hear from a Prophet of God and other of God's chosen leaders. The meetings were wonderful. One of my favorite talks was by Sister Elaine S. Dalton, a leader chosen by God to lead the young women's organization. Her talk hit on every point I strive to emphasize here on my blog. Though criticized by "Mormon Feminist Housewives", her talk was sensitive and straightforward in calling for respect of women. Their criticism actually motivated me  review and more carefully study Sister Dalton's, which proved to be a very uplifting and reaffirming experience. Here's my recap and commentary on her talk...

My favorite part of her talk was when she called for a return to virtue. She stated,

"Again I renew the call for a return to virtue. Virtue is the strength and power of daughters of God. What would the world be like if virtue- a pattern of thought and behavior based on high moral standards, including chastity- were reinstated in our society as a most highly prized value? If immorality, pornography, and abuse decreased, would there be fewer broken marriages, broken lives, and broken hearts? Would media ennoble and enable rather than objectify and degrade God's precious daughters? If all humanity really understood the importance of the statement "We are daughters of our Heavenly Father," how would women be regarded and treated?" (emphasis added by me!)

This paragraph is the whole point of my blog. If we as a society based our morals on the belief that women are daughters of God, so much of what I see at the battered women's shelter would disappear, laws would reflect the serious nature of the crimes committed against women. (Sister Dalton may not have necessarily been talking about laws and crimes, but this is my commentary) Sister Dalton's comments reached every concern that is faced by women today- chastity before marriage, domestic violence, sexual assault, pornography. She was criticized by the "Mormon Feminist" group as being insensitive to the victims of sexual assault, yet I believe she has a better understanding of victims than the mormon feminists do. The feminists ridiculed her for using the scripture Moroni 9:9 "And notwithstanding this great abomination of the Lamanites, it doth not exceed that of our people in Moriantum. For behold, many of the daughters of the Lamanites have they taken prisoners; and after depriving them of that which was most dear and precious above all things, which is chastity and virtue-" They claimed that her use of this scripture was insensitive to those who had been raped/ sexually assualted because she was telling them that they had their virtue taken from them. First of all, the scripture states that, not Sister Dalton. Secondly, victims of rape have had their virtue stolen from them; that is what is so evil about the crime. By saying they have not had their virtue taken from them, it is like saying murders have not taken life. I think it is a grave injustice to victims to say they have not had anything taken from them. By not acknowledging this fact, victims are not given a chance to recognize their feelings and heal properly. There is nothing worse than discounting a woman's feelings! Instead of validation and healing, a woman could feel confused about her sense of loss and helpless. In using this scripture, Sister Dalton validates the victims' sense of loss. She sympathizes with them in calling for a renewed recognition of the importance of virtue. If the world understood how precious virtue is, and treated rape as a crime that robs a woman of her sacred virtue, don't you think it would be taken more seriously? Maybe instead of society questioning a rape victim and whispering that she brought it on herself or that she wanted it but just felt guilty afterward, maybe they would stand up for the injustice that it is and prosecute the perpetrator. Now in so saying that a victim's virtue has been taken from her (or him, I sometimes forget to include that men are victims as well), I want to emphasize that she can heal through the atonement of Jesus Christ- not repent, she/he has no need for repenting as it wasn't a sin on their part, but the atonement offers the potential for not only repenting but also for healing. Preach My Gospel states, "All that is unfair about life can be made right through the Atonement". That includes wrongs that were done to us at no fault of our own. Where sexual assault is rampant on the earth today, Worldwide Sexual Assault Statistics claims that 1 in 3 women in the world have been raped or sexually assaulted, Sister Dalton is pointing out that if the world focused on women's virtue, if children were taught from an early age that women were to be respected as daughters of God, this would greatly reduce the rate of violence against women and tolerance for it. Obviously the way we're handling things now isn't lowering the rate of sexual assault and domestic violence. Its time to call for media to "ennoble (I love that concept of an ennobled woman) and enable" women, time for the "wait until marriage" girl or boy to be celebrated instead of mocked, and time to recognize that when you mess with a woman, you won't just have to deal with her father, one day you'll answer to her Heavenly Father. Thank you Sis. Dalton for expressing the Lord's concern for His daughters to the world. Thank you for standing up for our virtue and worth!

For Elaine S. Dalton's full talk see: We Are Daughters of Our Heavenly Father

The Women of Harry Potter

I LOVE this video I found about the women in the Harry Potter books. It brings together my two loves, Harry Potter and the ennobling of women. Awesome. Its a little long but take a look...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5Pj-MPN_co

(Some were having trouble viewing the embedded video, so here is the link)

Ready to Take Action?

Okay blog viewers, now is the chance for you to take action against a startling proposition. The Federal Communication Commission is considering changing its policy to allow the f-word on television and radio stations during daytime hours when children are watching/listening, and to allow female frontal nudity (which is "non-sexual" apparently) on television. These expletives will only be allowed as "fleeting", thank goodness right, because we all know that as soon as you hear that word or see that image its gone from your mind forever. (Yes, I am being sarcastic). I don't know how anyone could standby and allow this to happen. Without warning, children are going to be exposed to these things while flipping through the channels. And we wonder why kids aren't kids anymore. We throw them into adult situations and expect them to retain their innocence. It surprises me that we would ever even seek to change an "indecency policy". If it was indecent a year ago- its still indecent. Here is the link to the public announcement concerning the change:

FCC Press Release

Just a side note- Since this is a feminist blog, why is it okay to show female frontal nudity? Seriously though. Why are women's bodies chosen to be the allowed image on tv? As if we need to make even more commonplace women's degradation in public. It's disgusting that even though we're all liberalized and "equal" now, we're starting to become even less respected and valued with every passing day. How is allowing female nudity on television going to further society's views of women? It isn't. Feminism was about women being seen as intelligent, capable human beings ready to contribute to society. It was focused on gaining the vote for women, having an intellectual voice among men. It was about having opportunities to express themselves in creative spheres. Women were tired of being their husband's objects. They wanted more of life than having babies. Women craved respect. But now, we're allowing women to be objectified once more. I'm not a man, but I feel safe enough in saying that I don't think a man is thinking about how creative or intelligent women are when women are before them unclothed. So, women (and men!) exercise your voice by resisting this policy change. Don't allow men to decide that the world should be entitled to seeing a nude female on tv, no matter how fleeting the image may be.

Here's how to comment:

1. Go to http://apps.fcc.gov/ecfs/upload/begin?procName=&filedFrom=X.
2. Enter the code "13-86" in the "Proceeding Number" box and fill out the few remaining required fields.
3. Enter your comment in the text box provided and click "Continue."
4. From there, review your comment and click "Confirm."


Here's a comment template from the American Family Association, which you can copy and paste into the comment box:

I oppose any changes to the current FCC indecency standards that would allow television and radio stations to broadcast expletives and nudity on the public airwaves, even if brief or "fleeting."

The Supreme Court has confirmed the FCC's authority to enforce policies regarding expletives and nudity, especially during times when children are likely to be watching or listening.

Relaxing the current policy would not serve the public interest and I urge the FCC to reject all proposals that would allow for the broadcast of expletives and nudity on FCC-licensed stations.

Marriage

Though this week is Easter, and I was hoping to focus more on Christ and His treatment of women, the Supreme Court's discussions on protecting the Defense of Marriage Act has motivated me to write a little on the subject. As should be clear by now, I believe that men and women are very different with different strengths and purposes, yet equal. Together, a man and woman improve each other and teach each other. Marriage is when men and women can become one and work together to find lasting joy and happiness. Though I am not married, I have seen my sister's marriages up close on several occasions. I have seen my sisters grow from teenagers, to young adults, to wives and then to mothers. They have grown in many ways and it is amazing to see the women they have become as they have served their families. They have turned away from selfishness to selflessness. They have, on many occassions, given up things for the sake of their families. They have made decisions based on the needs of their children, instead of their own desires and even needs. And in these sacrifices, they have found joy; a joy that I look forward to experiencing in my own life. They also find a balance in life that can only come from two different people, with different views and opinions working together to find compromise. Everyone deserves to find joy in living outside of themselves, of enjoying family and finding deeper meaning in life. Yet, I feel that those seeking homosexual marriage will find continued disappointment, even if they receive all the rights they desire. Countless studies have been done on marriage and the benefits of it, emotionally, physically, etc. But this is based on marriage in a traditional sense- marriage between a man and a woman. This new hybrid marriage that is proposed is something entirely different, and cannot be expected to provide the same joy and benefit as traditional marriage is proven to do. While these advocating for homosexual marriage and rights desire the same level of satisfaction found by heterosexual marriages, they fail to account for the differences and consequences of a same sex marriage. We try so hard in society to make situations the way we want them, but in so excusing and ignoring certain facts, we are sure to fail- and same sex marriage is one of the many instances of this societal blindness. It reminds me of college. In college, you study a lot of moral issues, social issues and theories. We all get to a point where we think we can save the world. On paper, everything we want to work out can. Then we graduate and real life comes with a swift kick in the pants. Then we realize, life is more complicated than the theories we have on paper. The experimentation with same sex marriage is one of those issues. While we want to say, everyone is equal! and we should all have a rights to experience joy in family! and we need to show we're not biased by supporting the cause! Well, the idea is all good and fine, but we have to understand that this is real life. The consequences are real, are we ready to accept them? We don't know how same sex couple parenting affects children. We know that single parenting has a negative effect on children, but single parenting can't be avoided in a lot of cases. The children are going to be the ones influenced by the decisions being made. How can we consciously make decisions without having their best interest at heart? Children are entitled to a mother and a father. To go along with my thoughts, I found an article courageously written by a homosexual who is opposed to same sex marriage. His thoughts are intellectual and reasonable, taking into consideration real life and consequences. See the link below:

http://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2013/03/9432/

The Hope of Sunday

Going along with my post from yesterday, I thought I'd continue the thought of hope. At church today, our congregation's leader reminded us that the Thursday before Easter is when the Atonement began, as member's of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints believe, in the garden of Gethsemane. Christ's suffering for our sins, weaknesses, illnesses and pains was begun that night. I'm sure it was a dark night. It reminded me of my thoughts from week about the dark nights we all face. But as we encounter the hardships of life, the hope and peace of Easter Sunday lies beyond those dark nights. Because I can't tell the women at the shelter that Christ died and was resurrected for them, that He loves them and that they can have hope, I am saying it to you. Though we have terrible times and dark trials, the light and hope of Christ will lead us through our life's Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays until we get to Sunday. Below is an Apostle of Jesus Christ, Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin, testifying of the hope the Resurrection of Christ brings.

Just Another Thursday Night

Last night I was working answering a hotline for domestic violence. I work at a women's shelter. It was a fairly quiet evening so I decided to make the ladies some cookies as an evening snack. I was in the kitchen at the shelter, listening to some music and kind of humming along- after all, it's just another Thursday night to me- thinking about weekend plans. Then the hotline rang. I answered it and you never know what you're going to get when you answer that line. Sometimes the women are completely calm and collected, they've finally decided to leave and they are almost numb about it. Sometimes women are angry when they call. But this time, the woman was hysterical. I could barely understand anything she said, but I could pick out that there had just been a fight between she and her husband and she needed to get out. I let her talk even though I couldn't understand her, and when she was through I talked to her about the shelter. She realized that she needed to take care of a few things so I told her I'd be waiting for her to call back so we could bring her in. She hung up and I sat for a minute, just thinking about how it's just another Thursday night, but for her, her life just fell apart. Suddenly, she is homeless and alone. I'm sure, like everyone, she thought that this could never happen to her. I think we've all experienced this feeling, in various degrees; we believe that something can never happen to us but then it does. We all think that so many things are distant problems that won't ever find their way to us, but when they do- it crashes into the reality we believed existed and throws us into a reality we don't understand. For this woman, she suddenly understood that her husband is not the man she believed he was. Her whole reality changed. It makes me wonder how many people that happened to on Thursday night. You never know what people are going through.

A friend of mine shared a photo journal about domestic violence that I found to be both disturbing and important- if that's okay to say.
I have always thought photo journals are so interesting, because you can really capture so much in a photograph (especially when captions are provided). And with this content, a photo journal is so powerful; it brings you (fortunately and unfortunately) into the room with the abuse taking place.
Here's the link:
Photo Journal: Domestic Violence

I'm so glad the photographer included photographs of the couple happy as well as their fight. A lot of times victims don't recognize the abusive situation they are in because they do have happy times, and because the batterer often apologizes and expresses remorse. I won't take the time to talk about how women need to stop listening to words and listen to actions (excluding "I'm sorry" actions) right now.
Though some woman's Thursday night may have been the worst night of her life so far, it was also another Thursday night of healing for others. I had the chance to sit in on a support group on the same night and I was so humbled by the hope and faith of the women present. They shared stories of their abuse and stories about their anger and frustration, their helplessness and their difficulty with PTSD. Most of them have what the counselor called "learned helplessness"- which she described as a result of their batterer's constant belittling and anger when they tried to progress or change. Eventually, the victim stops trying to make friends, stops trying in school, and stops trying at everything since no matter how hard they work, it's never good enough. This information was a wake up to me. I feel fairly knowledgable about domestic violence, and had never considered why these women often have difficulty finding jobs and housing while in the shelter. But I digress, on to hope...
After the women shared their dark memories, they began to talk about hope and faith. One woman said, my Savior has brought me this far, I know he won't forsake me now. Many of the other women said similar things. I am not allowed to talk about religion or faith as an employee, but it warmed my heart as they spoke of the love they know their Savior has for them. I learned a lot that night, though your world may have collapsed and your reality has disappeared, if you KNOW that Christ is your Savior and that He loves you, you can find hope and happiness again. That is a lesson I learn over and over again and I am grateful for the example of these wonderful women! 

Happy International Women's Day

Women's Day is something I had to learn about in Armenia, because they actually celebrate it there! It is an international holiday yet here in America, it normally goes without recognition- though I have noticed for the last two years that the Google icon appreciates it! Women's day is not only celebrated in Armenia, however, it is cherished. The LDS church I attended there had a big luncheon for all the women, the men even came and told us how wonderful we are. Every man we passed on the street called out, "congratulations on your March 8th!" A lot of men even handed us small but well appreciated flowers. It was pretty great and a much needed relief from the more common disrespectful attitude. Nonetheless, a large impression was made on me that day and I have celebrated Women's Day ever since.
In honor of Women's Day, I wanted to post about a contemporary artist who is known as JR. He is a Parisian artist who started out as a graffiti artist in his teens but found a camera and decided to fuse the two. Not only his technique is interesting, but also his subject matter and purpose. His project "Women are heroes" is what I want to focus on for this special day. To complete this project, JR travelled to some of the most poverty stricken countries in the world, and spoke with women in the poorest villages. Then he spoke with the women about their lives, their struggles and their experiences. Next, he photographed them and plastered their blown up photographs on rooftops, trains, building sides...etc. "I was interested in women", JR states, "because I realized in the projects I had done before- most of the time in the kind if places I was going to- it was men on the street, but it's actually the women who are the ones holding the community together."
In 2008 JR travelled to Rio's oldest and most dangerous favela, Morro da Providencia. As JR photographed the women, he asked each woman to "give [him] something real". Instead of expected faces of despair, these women displayed "really strong eyes because they knew they would be facing the community", said JR.
In case you are concerned about this graffiti inspired art, don't be. JR's work is also socially and somewhat environmentally conscience. For example, in Kibera, he printed the rooftop photographs on vinyl so the homes they were displayed on would be waterproof- a luxury. Iron used in one project was afterwards distributed to the community participants.
To learn more about the project "Women are heroes" see this YouTube video.

In honor of Women's Day, here are some foundations I have found that are highly recommended ways of contributing to women's health and safety across the world. By going to www.globalgiving.org

Or
www.kiva.org
You can set up an account and be linked "people to people". You will be linked directly to a person overseas. You can browse through needs and and donate or lend to a cause or situation of your choice. Also, Women for Women International has really appealed to me. You sponsor a woman and can keep in contact with whoever you are sponsoring- I like that because I think you can get a better sense of what e situation is and where your money is going. It also helps you know your money isn't getting lost in a nonprofit office in NYC. If you decide you want to help someone, those are the options recommended by the book "Half the Sky" which I will discuss more in depth at a later time.

If, however, money is tight and you're not ready to get involved financially yet, just take a moment today to thank a woman for being the strong person she is! I'm personally grateful for the amazing examples of my mom and sisters in my life. They are strong, wonderful women that I look up to and learn from everyday. So, thanks Mom! For teaching me how to be strong!



For more information on the history of Women's Day see UN Women Watch

The Power of a Woman

One of my favorite paintings is "The Intervention of the Sabine Women" by Jacques-Louis David. There are a lot of paintings depicting the Roman story of the Rape of the Sabine Women, yet this painting focuses instead on the war that took place following the capture of the Sabine's daughters; more specifically, on the intervention of the women and how they stopped the war and brought peace between the Romans and the Sabines. 

Livy (the Roman historian) wrote, "[The women] went boldly into the midst of the flying missiles with disheveled hair and rent garments. Running across the space between the two armies they tried to stop any further fighting and calm the excited passions by appealing to their fathers in the one army and their husbands in the other not to bring upon themselves a curse by staining their hands with the blood of a father-in-law or a son-in-law, nor upon their posterity the taint of parricide. "If," they cried, "you are weary of these ties of kindred, these marriage-bonds, then turn your anger upon us; it is we who are the cause of the war, it is we who have wounded and slain our husbands and fathers. Better for us to perish rather than live without one or the other of you, as widows or as orphans."

In 1796, when David began this painting, France was at war with the rest of Europe. France's civil disputes had lead to international problems following the French Revolution, and its future was uncertain. David himself was in prison as a supporter of the Revolution. While in prison, his estranged wife visited him and he decided to paint this piece, as a commemoration to her and also as a cry to the people to reunite after the Revolution. The main figure in the painting is Hersilia, the wife of Romulus (one of the founders of Rome) who was also the daughter of Titus Tatius, the leader of the Sabines. She stands between her father and her husband with her babies at their feet. Because of her bold move, the leaders of the war stop fighting long enough to consider the destruction of two groups of people and the rising generation. 

Upon the painting's completion in 1799, it was originally exhibited with a large mirror so the viewer would look at the painting (which is life sized) and then look at themselves. It is obviously a call for the people to identify with Hersilia and take action in the unification of France. I absolutely love this painting for the story and for what it stands for. Hersilia's pose is so powerful. Though David painted her feminine- not necessarily physically strong- there is a definite strength about her. I think it interesting that David would choose her as the symbol for the way to reunite France. He must have had a high opinion of women and counted on them to restore France for the good of the rising generation. 

I think David was absolutely right. Women are the ones who can make change. They are the peacemakers, the ones who save lives and prepare for the success of future generations. Women, in their femininity, carry a strong power, the power that can stop wars, power that can unite families and in turn, build nations. 

Rosa Parks- An Example to Us All

Since yesterday was Martin Luther King Jr. day, I felt it was important to discuss African American women's contribution to civil rights. And of course, my mind went directly to Rosa Parks. Martin Luther King Jr said in his famous, "I have a dream" speech, "I have a dream that [we] will live in a nation where [we] will not be judged by the color of [our] skin but by the content of [our] character." Rosa Parks proved her character. Before she took the stand to sit on the bus, Rosa had a background of civil rights involvement. Because she already had a strong foundation- a strong character of standing up for what was right- her highly influential and spontaneous decision to sit that day was simply an external expression of her character. She said of her act, "When I made that decision, I knew I had the strength of my ancestors with me". She had the confidence of truth to strengthen her as well. I've often heard that Rosa Parks said she was tired and didn't want to move. I refuse to believe that to be true. She knew the stakes of refusing to stand so a white person could have her seat. She knew she could go to jail for it, and she did. She knew there would be a price to pay, and that price would be more tiring than standing for a few minutes. Instead, she held strong in a seemingly small way, in what I'm sure was a fearful situation. Her "small" act went on to inspire a large scale boycott that eventually led the US Supreme Court to rule that Montgomery bus segregation law unconstitutional. Buses were then integrated. Rosa Parks was a courageous woman. Not only the color of her skin, but her gender was also a barrier for her to overcome at such a time. But nothing deterred her from protesting for change. She is a great example for us all. Though it often seems that the stands we take are small and insignificant, they make change. The choices we make everyday eventually lead to a big change in ourselves, and always affect those around us. Simple choices will strengthen others to make difference choices as well. So continue forward with choices in which you feel alone. Be strengthened by truth. Because just like Martin Luther King Jr said, one day, we will be judged based solely on our character.

The LDS church is the "most progressive force for women in the world today"

This is a really short post, but I felt it was definitely worth sharing. A good friend of mine sent me this article that I will not even attempt to shorten because it can't do it justice. Valerie Hudson Cassler is a professor of political science at Texas A&M and wrote an article about how the LDS faith has taught her the importance of women. Here is a link to her fabulous article:

http://mormonscholarstestify.org/1718/valerie-hudson-cassler


I love the last of what she writes saying that spreading this doctrine is the "strongest, most progressive force for women in the world today". 
I completely agree with that statement having seen it first hand. In my time in Armenia, the most progressive families I ever met were solid, truly converted members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. As Cassler states earlier in her article, Mormon culture can sometimes go amiss in the treatment of women, yet the doctrine is solid and ever pointing to the equality of men and women. And the case was never truer than in Armenia. There were about 4 solid families I met where I could feel the respect I had grown up under appreciating in the US. And every one of those families were families who attended church on Sundays, read their scriptures and invited the spirit of the Lord into their homes. As I visited with families not of the LDS faith, I sometimes felt the disrespect of women so bitterly, it was overwhelming. So right on Valerie Hudson Cassler (I love how you use all 3 names), right on!